Everything's Coming Up Roses.. Born On This Day... Gay Icon Ethel Merman

I only saw Ethel Merman 2 times. On Broadway in Hello, Dolly!, a role written for her that she finally played 6 years after the musical opened. She really was an A+ Dolly Levi & she received several ovations the evening I was lucky enough to be in the house. I was in the audience for a concert at The Dorothy Chandler in 1974, supporting her disco album.

She was a bookkeeper's daughter from Queens, who worked as a stenographer by day & sang at local parties by night.

Eventually, she acquired an agent who got her some cabaret engagements in Manhattan, & 22 years old, George & Ira Gershwin asked her to come & sing some songs they had written for their new musical- Girl Crazy.

At the end of the audition George Gershwin stated, "Miss Merman, if there's anything you'd like to change, I'd be happy to do so." Merman: “No, the songs will do very nicely".

Girl Crazy opened in the autumn of 1930 & when she sang I Got Rhythm, the audience went wild, & demanded 10 encores. Afterwards she took the subway home to Astoria, but the next day she went to lunch with the Gershwins who showed her the reviews & explained that she was now a star. George Gershwin told her: "Never take a singing lesson", & she never did.

She had a huge brassy belting voice, but she also had such impeccable diction that every word, every syllable, could be heard in every seat in the theatre. It was this skill that made her so appealing to composers & lyricists. She was adored by the Gershwins, Cole Porter, Irving Berlin, Stephen Sondheim & even Igor Stravinsky.

Merman couldn't read music but she was able memorize a song after a few hearings. Cole Porter: "She can sing anything. But I really tailor-made my songs for her because I know her range so well." Her best note was A-natural & he often ended phrases on that note. He knew he could trust her to handle his complicated rhythms & he loved the fact that she could sing "Flying too high with some guy in the sky is my idea of nothing to do" in one breath.

Producers adored Merman. She almost never missed a show. She demanded high fees, but once the contract was signed, she was utterly reliable.

Merman had a long stage career, from Girl Crazy in 1930 to Hello, Dolly! in 1970. She was still belting out There's No Business Like Show Business when she was in her 70s. She released that disco album & The NY Times reviewed it as: "not quite so embarrassing as might have been feared".

Not really pretty or sexy, Merman was also a bit dim. She never read a book, & when someone asked "Is the Pope Catholic?", she helpfully supplied the answer: "Yes". Her favorite drink was champagne… on the rocks.

She did her own book-keeping & counting pennies; her first agent- Lou Irwin: "3 things are important to Ethel, the first is money, & the second is money & the third is money." She disliked travel & once said that her idea of exercise was sunbathing.

Merman would marry 4 times, never happily, her last marriage, to Ernest Borgnine, ended after 5 weeks. She had 2 children by her second husband, Bob Levitt, but devoted little time to them.

I think the best thing about her was her exuberance and willingness to make fun of herself. At 72 years old, she appeared in the movie Airplane! playing a wounded soldier so traumatized that he believed he was Ethel Merman, & she leapt from his/her hospital bed singing Everything's Coming up Roses.

I have read gossip claiming that she was lesbian & Jewish, but I have found nothing that points to either being true. The writer Jacqueline Susann once stood outside her door yelling "Ethel, I love you!"; but Merman never showed the slightest interest in women. The character Helen Lawson in Susann’s novel Valley of the Dolls is based on Merman.

Although my young wards at my job have never heard of her, she remains a gay icon to men of a certain age, beloved of drag artists. There is an Ethel Merman choir, consisting entirely of Merman impersonators, in San Francisco.

As a kid, I thrilled to her appearances on made dozens of television appearances, guesting on variety series hosted by Perry Como, Red Skelton, Dean Martin, Ed Sullivan, & Carol Burnett, on talk shows with Mike Douglas, Dick Cavett, & Merv Griffin. When Merman died in 1984, I lit a candle for her while listening to Gypsy. I do an outstanding imitation of her.

"Broadway has been very good to me. But then, I've been very good to Broadway."



Her final performance.

Broadway Baby

Happy Birthday, Bernadette Lazzara! Of all the Broadway Divas: Betty, Barbara, Patti, Chita, Kristin, Audra, Chita, Carol, or even Angela, the one with the most special place in my heart & on my stereo is Bernadette Peters. I first saw her in George M! in 1968 & I absolutely fell in love with the voice, the va va voom curves, the cinnamon curls, the dramatic chops, & the crack comic timing. But, it is really about the voice. She has been working on stage for 59 years: Curley McDimple, Dames At Sea, George M!, On The Town, Mack & Mabel, Sunday In The Park With George, Song & Dance, Into The Woods, The Goodbye Girl, Annie Get Your Gun, & Gypsy!.

Bernadette does amazing work for animal rights with her organization with Mary Tyler Moore- Broadway Barks & is the author of a popular children’s book of the same name.


I have seen her many times in musicals & in concert. My personal favorite was Annie Get Your Gun on Broadway in 1999. Peters sings with her whole body. Not just a few arm gestures for punctuation, as many excellent singers offer, but the music seems to travel from her toes to the tip of her nose as she bends, reaches & throws her head back to let out the final notes.


Peters is wrapping up a run in Follies on Broadway, a production that started at The Kennedy Center last summer. I believe that her version of Losing My Mind on the cast album is the most moving of all the many takes on this ballad.


Peters turns 64 today & she looks terrific. A perfect example of the advantage of staying out of the sun. But again, for me it is all about the voice:

Born On This Day- May 9th... Cole Porter

I was so enamored of the songs of Cole Porter & the story of his life & friendships, that my parents gave me huge “coffee table” book about this great American songwriter for Christmas when I was 11 years old, & then followed it up with another big book of his collected lyrics for my birthday the next week. I still have both books.

Born in Peru, Indiana in 1891, Porter studied music from an early age, & began composing as a teenager. After high school he attended Yale University, where he was voted “most entertaining man.” He went on to law school at Harvard University,  but his interest remained in music. At Harvard he continued to write songs, & a some of his pieces were used in Broadway musicals.


In 1916, his first full score was performed. The musical- See America First was a flop & closed after only 15 performances. Bruised by the experience, he began to travel around Europe & got an apartment in Paris. This was the beginning of his life long affection for the city, which he would return to in songs- You Don’t Know Paree & I Love Paris. During his time in Europe, Porter contributed to many musicals, but until his song- Let’s Do It, Let’s Fall In Love appeared in the 1928 musical Paris, he had not had a big hit. Paris was a place Cole flourished socially. He attended parties with his pal Noel Coward. The parties of the era were elaborate & fabulous, attended by the upper crust. His own parties were marked by gay & bisexual activity, cross-dressing, international musicians & actors, & a large surplus of recreational drugs. I sometimes think I was born in the wrong era.


Porter started spending time with American divorcee- Linda Thomas, & they became close friends quickly. Their financial status & social status made them prefect as a married couple.The fact that Linda's ex-husband was abusive & Cole was gay made the arrangement even more perfect. Linda was always one of Porter's staunch supporters & being married increased his chance of success. Being married to Porter allowed Linda to keep high status in society for the rest of her life. They married in 1919 & lived in a happy arrangement, a successful public relationship, but a sexless marriage until Linda's death in 1954.


Porter was happy with a life in Hollywood in the 1930s, including a more liberal movie industry where Porter enjoyed more open sexual adventures. At the time, it was somewhat more acceptable to be an eccentric gay artist, but Linda feared for Porter’s reputation & career. Her social standing was threatened by his activities & the rumors in upper-crust social circles.


Despite a horseback riding accident in 1937 that crippled him for life, Porter produced much of his best work in the 1940s &1950s. He wrote 100s of songs for Broadway shows, movie musicals, & TV specials. His most successful musical- Kiss Me Kate opened in 1948 & ran for over a 1000 performances. A recluse in his later years, Porter died in California in 1964.


In 1945 the film Night & Day was made with Cary Grant, allegedly about the life of Cole Porter. This movie has almost nothing to do with the actual life of the songwriter. Night & Day leaves out the important elements of his gay life, & his sexless marriage of convenience.


The 1990 album- Red, Hot, & Blue. features Cole Porter songs sung by popular musicians of the 1980s & 1990s. It remains a favorite of mine. The dismal 2004 movie- De-Lovely, with an improbable Kevin Kline as Porter, came a tiny bit closer to the true story & featured beautiful sets, major actors, famous current musicians, & a strong Hollywood marketing campaign for the movie & the soundtrack. But for me, this movie is a miserable, great big mess.





Along with George Gershwin, Richard Rogers & Jerome Kern, Porter moved from the sentimentality & simplicity that dominated the popular song. His urbane wit & musical complexity gave us songs such as What Is This Thing Called Love, I Get A Kick Out of You, & Anything Goes, that have withstood the test of time. While he is known for many upbeat show tunes, Porter has a more melancholy side with songs like Miss Otis Regrets & my person favorite- Ev’ry Time We Say Goodbye. We still have his amazing, witty, sophisticated music.


An anecdote: Cole Porter had quite the thing for large, beautiful men of color. He was putting the moves on a handsome, young black room service waiter while staying at the Ritz Hotel. The waiter explained that Porter's wishes would be obliged for a certain amount of cash. Cole Porter's replay: "Miss Otis Regrets She Is Unable To Lunch Today".

Lyrics on Several Occasions

My postings got really GAY there for awhile. Gay Life & Gay History are important subjects to me, but certainly not the only interests that I hold.
One of my life long obsessions has been - The Popular Song. When I was very young, I would come home from school at 2:20pm (I had the house to myself until 5:30pm) & I would listen to & dance to music for most of the afternoon (or until Dark Shadows started). I used a candlestick as my microphone & I would pretend that I was a guest on the Mike Douglas Show. I would sing my newest single & then settle down for my interview with Mike. Then Mike Douglas would urge me on to do one more number, as he asked the studio audience to applaud loudly & with enthusiasm to encourage me. I would oblige.
My parents recently made a mixed tape of all my favorite songs from when I was under six years old. They claim that my first favorite song was "Constantinople"... " oh you can't go back to Constantinople, no you can't go back to..." by The Four Lads.
As a very young man I started to collect books about composers. I received a big "coffee table" style book of the Complete Lyrics of Cole Porter for my 12th birthday. I soon had books about all the major composers & lyricists of popular songs & show tunes, which for decades were the same thing. Two of my favorites are Lyrics On Several Occasions by Ira Gershwin (1959) & a big thick collection - Reading Lyrics (2000).
Here are two of my favorite lyrics from two very different talents:

Cole Porter

My story is much to sad to be told
But practically everything leaves me totally cold
The only exception I know is the case
When Im out on a quiet spree, fighting vainly the old ennui
Then I suddenly turn and see your fabulous face

I get no kick from champagne
Mere alcohol doesnt thrill me at all
So tell me why should it be true
That I get a kick out of you

Some get a kick from cocaine
I'm sure that if I took even one sniff
It would bore me terrific'ly too
But I get a kick out of you

I get a kick evrytime I see you standing there before me.
I get a kick though its clear to me
You obviously don't adore me.

I get no kick in a plane.
Flying too high with some guy in the sky
Is my idea of nothing to do,
Yet I get a kick out of you.

(my Complete Lyrics of Cole Porter has 16 more verses... some very ribald)

Elvis Costello

Don't tell me you don't know what love is
When you're old enough to know better
When you find strange hands in your sweater
When your dreamboat turns out to be a footnote
I'm a man with a mission in two or three editions

And I'm giving you a longing look
Everyday, everyday, everyday I write the book

Chapter One we didn't really get along
Chapter Two I think I fell in love with you
You said you'd stand by me in the middle of Chapter Three
But you were up to your old tricks in Chapters Four, Five and Six

And I'm giving you a longing look
Everyday, everyday, everyday I write the book

The way you walk
The way you talk, and try to kiss me, and laugh
In four or five paragraphs
All your compliments and your cutting remarks
Are captured here in my quotation marks

Don't tell me you don't know the difference
Between a lover and a fighter
With my pen and my electric typewriter
Even in a perfect world where everyone was equal
I'd still own the film rights and be working on the sequel

And I'm giving you a longing look
Everyday, everyday, everyday I write the book