Party like you're 80.

Today I took 5 children under 10 to the grocery store. I managed like a professional cat herder.

Old man in checkout: See all this gingerale I have? I'm having a party.

Me: Huh? Oh, that's cool.

Man: Yep. It's my birthday.

Me: Oh hey, happy birthday.

Man: I'm 80 now

Me: Oh yeah? 80 huh?

Man: Yeah. My wife is 71. We're celebrating.

Me: You gonna drink all that gingerale?

Man: Not by myself.

Me: I should hope not. That's a lot of gingerale for one person.

Man: Yes, my wife will have some.

Me: She's a lucky lady, then. Should be a hell of a party.

Ben: Excuse me, is this penny yours?

Man: Not anymore.

I can't wait until I'm 80.