Why do I gain 5 lbs. of water weight over night when I get my period? What could possibly be happening while I sleep?
Why do these 5 lbs. make me want to jump off a bridge?
Why does my hair look good on days that I have nothing to do and don't leave the house?
Why did the man in front of me at Hot Yoga yesterday think that getting a tattoo of Marilyn Monroe on his left calf was a good idea?
How does Burger King make their breakfast biscuits so good?
Why do I only want these breakfast biscuits when I am on my period?
Why does the drive-thru girl at Burger King get irritated with me when I ask for a plain biscuit every morning for a week out of every month?
How do Velcro curlers work? I mean, it amazes me that my hair actually curls using rollers with no heat in them.
Why do I think I am in a perfectly pleasant mood until someone talks to me and I bite their head off and realize that I am not in a good mood at all?
Why do babies wait until they have a clean diaper on to go poo?
Why does my baby prefer to go poo while standing in the back of my walk-in closet... right behind my bridesmaid dress from my sister's wedding?
Why is is that I can't stand the Wiggles and think they are all mentally deranged, but I have little crushes on the Imagination Movers?
Why can't I go to Vegas with my friend just because my husband is deployed? What trouble could I possibly get into in Vegas?
Why did Jennifer Aniston ever date that tool John Mayer?
Why does the nail polish on my toes last for years, but the nail polish on my fingers only lasts for half a day before it chips?
How come there are not any shows on TV like Laverne and Shirley or Happy Days anymore?
Am I the only one that misses big hair'd 80's rock bands?
Why do I feel the need to buy magazines that will give the diet secrets of the stars when I know that their secrets are really just diet pills and starvation?
Why is plastic surgery so damn expensive.
Why does my 14 year old think she deserves a social life on the weekend? pffft.
Why does a rabbit hide eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs, they lay rabbits... Why don't we have a Easter Chicken?
Why does getting a text message excite me?
Why does it take me 30 minutes to text someone back and it only takes them half a second to respond again?
What in the world is a SMS Message?
Is Chad Kroeger married?
Sigh.
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