Friday, April 17, 2009

T. G. I... WHAT?

What day is it? Friday? Seriously? How in the HELL did that happen? Wasn't it just Monday and I was apologizing for the lack of a Monday Swoon that turned into a early Tuesday Swoon that turned into a Wednesday birthday Swoon which turned into a "I am an apple, hear me roar" swoonish-kinda-maybe-not-thing-a-ma-jig... and now it is Friday?

Holy Crap.

What happened to this week?

What happened to my life?

Just a few weeks ago I was happy in the laziness of my life that offered me time to blog amazing moments of clarity (go with me on this.... ). I was able to clean my house, organize the bills, play with the chillin's, chat on the phone with my father-my mother-my sisters-my long lost friends, I was able to cook (HAHAHAHA), get a pedicure, maybe shop for some bras, and even write one of the most amazing chapters in the history of book writing that you may never know about because now... NOW... I have no time for anything.

Hot Yoga did this to me I tell you-or maybe it was the burst of Spring that brought with it new activities and schedules.

Yep.

As you know the kids are playing ball-which puts my tiny little hot yoga sitting flesh on a cold hard steel bleachers six days out of the week. That is right... you heard me, SIX DAYS! That is fine though, I don't mind. It would be easier if I knew anything about technology and I could post this blog from my cell phone and tell you about random things I see at the ball parks-which are so humorous that I would get an award or something for mentioning them... but I am too tired by the end of a long day that I forget about all of the colorful people you meet while your rear end is frozen to cold steel.

Have I mentioned hot yoga? Oh yes... I did. You see, I have become addicted-I can't help it. The only set back is that it is a 90 minute class... so that means 90 minutes away from my children to do some soul searching and inward focusing on my own life--which, HELLO!-what mother in their right mind really can do that without feeling completely guilty? Not me... I feel guilty that I am healing my body and starting to look like a FREAKIN' SUPERMODEL in the meantime (okay, there is something completely false about that last sentence... but I am not going to tell you which part-you are smart, you figure it out... meditate on it if you have to.)

I have also been in search of the perfect lawn service for our house... one that is not commercial and can speak mostly English... oh, and one that does not cost an arm and a leg. I just want a couple of people who know how to mow, fertilize, landscape, mulch, toil, weed, germinate, pollinate, edge, and do it with a smile and a "yes ma'am."

Sigh.

The house is also getting painted-I have changed the colors and our painters is such a nice ol' guy that he put all kinds of samples of colors on the side of the house for me to decide which I like better.

I am not good with that kind of thing.

I have to look at it in the sun, in the rain, in the early morning, in the early evening, when the sun is coming up, when the sun is going down, and when I am in a good mood, and when I am in a bad mood... so after a couple weeks of stressing over which shade of BROWN I prefer on the house-I have decided and he will start on Monday-which means I will go over on Monday afternoon and freak out because I'll think I chose the wrong color.

I am cursed.

Not to mention the kids have this whole school thing going on. Ugh-when is it over I ask you? 25 more days and life will be easier right? When they are home 24/7 looking for me to entertain them.... I can't wait! Seriously... I can't wait. Honest. Cross my heart.

Actually, I really can't wait to stop getting up at the crack of dawn and driving them to that building where they learn things and become responsible citizens.

They'll just use that knowledge against me one day-I just know it.

So, today is Friday-which means tomorrow is Saturday and then Sunday and then it is Monday again. Wow! Where did the weekend go? I can only hope that I get a few beers in me sometime between now and the Monday Swoon... or what will be the point really?

And yes, it is 4:30 in the morning on Friday and I am wide awake-hot yoga is making me think too much I think-see, there I go again. It is also making me want to go to bed at 9:30, when I usually don't crawl between the downy fresh sheets until at least 1 a.m. so now I am becoming a early riser instead of a night owl? Wait a minute... that ain't right! I need my night times... for more productive things like watching hulu.com and reading my Entertainment Weekly magazine, which has been sitting on my kitchen table all week with the boys from The Fast and Furious just staring up at me-taunting me.

Freakin' Fridays.


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