Tuesday, December 16, 2008

We're Not In Virginia Anymore Toto...

Today in Omaha, which I will now loving call "Snowmaha" or "Coldmaha" we woke up to snow. Nothing severe yet, but as the morning progresses we are supposed to get about 4 inches. No big deal.

My kids looked at me and said "Maybe we should turn on the radio and see if the schools are closed." My son was even eating breakfast with one leg in and one leg out of his uniform pants with the hopes that the fear of snow would cause the doors to the school to be locked up with chains and a sign posted that read: "No school today due to snow drifts and frostbite."

I just looked at them and said, "We live in Nebraska now. There will be school."

When we lived in Virginia, it seemed that every time we turned around school was being cancelled due to snow-or even the threat of snow in the forecast. We homeschooled at the time, so snow days did not affect us, but I had to laugh at the fact that if there were flurries in the air everything would shut down and people would make a run on the grocery store to stock up with potato chips and dip to weather out the "storm."

I must say that it was refreshing driving this morning, in the snow, with other motor vehicle operators that actually knew how to drive in these weather conditions. I am sure the reason everything was shut down in Virginia when a simple dusting of snow came through was because people did not know how to actually drive in the white stuff that was falling from the sky and causing their commute into DC to double from 2 hours to 4 hours! Curses!

I grew up in Chicago (but it was not as corrupt back then as it is now... back then Chicago had my father and he knew how to hunt people down like dogs. He had a group of Irish relatives and friends that would not tolerate corruption, or punk politicians. But that is a post for another time... and possibly another blog altogether.) Anyway, I grew up in Chicago and my father waited until a blizzard hit and there was 14 inches of snow on the ground before he looked at me and said "Are you ready to go take your driving test?" Needless to say, I failed my first attempt (hey, have you ever tried to parallel park in a blizzard driving a 1979 powder blue passenger van that could seat 16 and the drivers seat was being propped up by a stack of old newspapers? I didn't think so.) But I aced it the second time... but I had to wait a month for the next blizzard to hit.

So, unless you were raised by a father like mine, who has never been in a car accident and can maneuver the Dan Ryan as if he were driving the Indy 500, you should not drive in the snow. You will just make all of the people out there who do know how to drive in the snow mad. I am willing to bet that if you call someone who does know how to drive in the snow and say "Look, I am incompetent and do not know how to drive carefully and slowly and I don't know if I should turn my steering wheel in the direction of the way the car is spinning or the other way... could you please pick me up?" They would be happy to oblige.

As for me, I need to go shower because I have too many errands to run today to let a measly 4 inches of snow stop me. Christmas is only 9 days away!

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