This morning I woke with bounding joy and energy. OK, that was a lie. I don't think I have ever in my life woke with bounding energy... more like "Crap, is it morning already? What day is it? Do I have children? How did I get so fat? Is that a baby I hear crying? Why are people calling for MOM? Is it too early to eat leftover cake? I hate mornings."
I do however have joy in the morning... at least that is what all the sweet old ladies tell me at Church. They look at my children and say "What joy you must have in your heart." It is true... I do have joy in my heart. I am just not sure if it comes from the children who have sprung forth from my loins or from the leftover cake I had for breakfast.
ANYWAY... this morning I woke up and decided to start making lists. When I start making lists that means that I am about to go all cleaning lady up in here (I am so hip hoppy-even when I am not trying.) I am about to get out my bucket o' cleaning supplies and scrub and wipe until my neighbor calls to ask if I am cleaning because she can see a mushroom cloud of bleach fumes hovering above my house.
Well... it has not worked out quite the way I planned today. First my sister called, and then I had to call my other sister and discuss everything that the other sister said, and then my dad called to tell me that his dog would not go outside to poop and he has been yelling at the damn thing all morning. Oh, and his Christmas cactus is starting to bloom Then I decided to change the ink cartridges for my printer so that I could print more pictures that will ultimately end up in a shoebox with all of the other pictures that I swear will one day be in photo albums with cute captions and squiggly lined decorations (you should know that I have completed a total of two scrapbooks in my entire life. Both were done before I had children. I think I am too cynical to make happy scrapbooks. It is a curse) Then I put the baby to bed and made lunch for the 5 year old which she did not like so I decided to eat her lunch as well as my own. And now I am heading to pick up the older kids from school and that will lead into homework and evening activities and a dinner that my 5 year old will refuse to eat...
So my bucket o' cleaning supplies are sitting in my bathroom waiting to be used. My shower is crying out to be cleaned, my toilet is begging for a little fresh air and my sink is pleading to have the concrete toothpaste chiseled off of it, but it will have to wait for another day. I cannot even guarantee it will be tomorrow that I get around to cleaning my bathroom. Cleaning a bathroom is something that you have to wake up and want to do... not something that you can just willy-nilly decide to do on a whim. There are certain clothes that need to be worn for bathroom cleaning day and your hair needs to be up in a ponytail. I mean, why would I clean my bathroom after I did my hair and put make up on? That would be like dating someone from the wrong side of the tracks, taboo, weird, just not right.
Maybe I'll just go in and spray the cleaner on the walls of the shower real quick... and squirt a little in the toilet and take a Lysol wipe to the sink. That should buy me some time don't you think? Lord only knows when I will wake up and want to clean again... it could be weeks, even months!
Most likely it will be tomorrow because who am I kidding? I cannot stand a dirty bathroom... why, it was just 3 days ago that I scrubbed the floors until my fingers bled.
Being a housewife is hard I tell you... hard.
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