Gentlemen... Start Your Brains

I know that most of my readers are of the female persuasion... but there are a few fellas out there that read me so this post if for you.

I am going to help you-you need to send me flowers to thank me.

May 11 is Mother's Day. There... I helped you.

I tell you this because I just read it on my calendar and I groaned a little inside. I groaned because I am doing it to myself again. I am thinking up all kinds of happy romantic ideas that my husband will do for me for Mother's Day and then Mother's Day will come and go and none of it will happen. I will be left making dinner for everyone, cleaning the house, and ultimately getting in a fight with my husband about the fact that he didn't do anything (or anything that I consider worthy enough) and I will go to bed mad and drunk.

This is what I think a husband should do for their wife on Mother's Day: He should worship her. He should get the kids up early and help them make her breakfast in bed. He should have taken the kids to the store THE WEEK PRIOR and helped the kids pick our little presents for her-some suggestions are her favorite perfume, her favorite candy bar, her favorite flavor of Doritos, her favorite lotion, a frame with a picture of the kids, a good book, a home decorating magazine... that kind of stuff. He should then take his wife and children to Church and pray for his wife the entire time he is there. After Church he should take his wife and children on a picnic lunch to a park and not one that used to be a battleground. After an afternoon of sunning themselves on a blanket and letting the kids play, the husband should take the wife home and insist she take a nap. He should make sure she wakes to the smell of her favorite dinner cooking and she should come down to a set dinner table and a freshly vacuumed house. When dinner is over, he should hand his wife a beer (or glass of wine) and tell her to go read in the living room while he and the kids do the dishes. After dishes the husband should suggest a nice walk with his wife (no kids allowed) and upon return to the house, the husband should bathe and put all children to bed while his wife watches what she wants on the television. When the kids are in bed and the bathroom is cleaned up from evening baths, the husband should then bring a bowl of ice cream to his wife and rub her feet telling her how much he loves her and how much he appreciates ever thing she does for him and their children. He should then just gaze into her eyes-never once looking down at her breasts.

If you do this men, I can guarantee you that you will love the close of Mother's Day. Remember... be good to Mama and she will be good to you.

Start preparing now, because she will know the difference between a well thought out plan and one that you throw together at the last moment.

Good Luck!