Saturday, January 5, 2008

Cake Cutting 101...

finicky made an interesting comment on his blog and on here about the fact that he will never try and cut a birthday cake again. the Mom asked the proper way to cut a birthday cake in order to get enough pieces for all to eat... and then to leave some for that late night kitchen raid.

I cut a birthday cake the same way my mother cuts a birthday cake. It is simple and genius. Everyone gets a piece-maybe even two. It gives you everything you need-cake and icing. There is not a lot of cake for those little rug rats who only eat the icing and there is not a lot of icing for those strange human beings (my husband) who will only eat the cake and not the icing (I know, I know... I blame his mother.)

I decided to give you a play-by-play on how to cut a cake the June Cleaver way. This brought me to a strange predicament though. Since I am on Weight Starvers I surely could not bake a cake and show you how to cut it because I would end up eating the cake and I have already borrowed my points for the next month or so. I needed to stay strong so I came up with the brilliant idea of making a diagram cake. Sure it is not as yummy, but it works. I don't want to hear one complaint about me not using a real cake. You are not here to eat it with me so there.

Before I did all of this, I had to shower. I could never let all of you see me before a shower. I even put on makeup for you... that is how much I love you.

OK-on to the cake cutting...
First thing, find an apron you like. I used to think aprons were for old grandmas. Once when I was young (and horribly thin) I went to a military wives tea at the Commander's home. The Commander's wife answered the door with a little apron on and continued to wear this apron throughout the tea. I went directly home and told my husband to kill me if I ever started wearing aprons. Well, I have gotten over my fear of aprons and now I am old now and have become an apron whore. I will not tell you how many I have...

OK, now that you have your apron on, lets cut it shall we? The cake... cut the cake.

Here is the cake I will be demonstrating on... I apologize that it is not chocolate and does not have icing. This is really depressing.

First you take your handy dandy knife and cut a radius line. (Remember, radius is half of a circle, a diameter is across the entire circle.) Look, this picture looks like my butt. I could have just photocopied my rear upstairs on the copy machine for this demonstration. Thank goodness this is a family web site.

Then you cut slices in the cake. Here we already have 5 slices! Wow!

You can always make your slices thicker for those pesky kids who scream out " I want a BIG piece!" or for your own personal slice of heaven.

Now let's compare my way to the traditional method shall we? Notice how many more slices I have gotten out of the cake? I am so smart. I bet my slices have fewer Weight Starver points as well. I probably could have actually baked a cake for this demonstration...

Even if you do go ahead and try and slice the cake the old way, you may get the same amount of pieces but you run the risk of having very thin slices that will fall apart and get entirely too soggy with ice cream. My way gives you a sturdy slice of cake that stands up to most ice cream scoops... even homemade.

The best part about my cutting method is that when the party is over and everyone is in bed, you can slip down to the kitchen and cut one of your slices in half again for a little sumpin' sumpin' before you fall into a sugar induced coma. Mmmmmmm! I love me some guuuuud cake.

So there you have it. Try it. If you have any other questions I would be happy to help you out. I know how to fold a mean bath towel, and my vacuuming skills are crazay!

I hope I helped~go forth and eat cake!

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